May 27, 2016

Working out our marriage.

I know this is going to be a very personal entry I ever written in this blog. But I really feel like sharing it with people out there..who probably experiencing what I've been going through in my marriage life.

Never have I ever thought of writing about marriage in this blog, I mean what about marriage to talk about, really? 

Apparently, plenty. 

Just a little background to my new follower, I'm Indonesian, born and breed in Jakarta, moved to Singapore then now, settling in Auckland. My partner on the other hand, is Indonesian, grow up in Auckland, moved to Singapore and back to Auckland, again. Which is easy to digest in the first place, that we both are Indonesian, has been living in same place, and been married to each other for 5 years. Easy peasy? not.

In these past 5 years I realized marriage brings out the best and the worst in me.The relationship has turned me into someone I don't even feel comfortable with, and the "I" in me stands pretty strong compare to the "We" that both of us need to build. I am far from the dream girl she ever want, and he is not the guy that I wish he will be. The unmet expectation is bloody real! and that is painful.

I learned the " Unmet expectation " could kills the romance, it could distance out your relationship with your partner, and it sure did drive me crazy. Not to the point where I wanna draft out what's yours and what's mine, and sign here, kind of situation - but it ever crossed my mind, what if..

Then, that "what if.." leads me to another level of disappointment. Another anger, another thought that consuming me from the inside, and lashing out over small little shit, like the mess he made, the wine glass he never wash, or as simple as whose turn to charge the phone. I know right, these sounds fucking hideous? But hey, this happened - like exactly weeks ago. 

My household was tense. My house was just a house. My partner was the man I married to. My family was just him, me, and Ethan. The sex was just exercise. The love was gone. 

I don't wish this to ever happen in anyone, but if this is the stage of your marriage - come on, you can fix this. I can fix what was so wrong weeks ago, and I know you can, too. I am still in process but going really strong; and I have to tell you that my family is happier, my house is now a home to us, I feel like I have a husband, and I love being who I am, again. The bless-full me.

I started a big step to talk about it. Talk about it with him.

My tears bucketing down from my eyes when I talked about this to my partner. Like literally sobbing x hyperventilated x mumbling. Imagine that. LOL! I poured it all out, and omg, it was so hard to breath. LOL! I started by telling him what I feel, how I feel about what's going on, and how I want whatever things going on, fixed. This moment was hard to do without crying..fml. LOL! 

Stay focus on what is the problem.

Share your concern and work it out. I feel focusing on one major concern and work it out is better than lashing out brutally. I'm no expert in this, I'm just sharing up what is work for my relation.

Find the middle ground as solution.

Realizing that we can never get ALL that we want, is a good start. From there, find what is middle ground on how far the both willing to go to make it work.

That night, was our turning point. 

I feel he start to treat me good.
I feel we start talking heart to heart, again.
I feel that we are getting closer, again.
I feel that he stops pointing out my mistakes.
I feel that marriage is workable WHEN the two are willing to WORK IT OUT, together.

When I write this, I feel that I made a very right decision to be married to this guy, 5 years ago.
For I know, I am in a right track having someone like him to work my marriage with. It will never get any easier, but it's gonna be worth it. 

Happy anniversary, bang. 
The marriage life we have isn't a rainbow and unicorn, but we'll work it out.
Like you said, it will all end up well.

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March 21, 2016

Olla! It's Autumn in Auckland :)

One of my favourite season of the year..I love to see all the leaves and flower start to witter and change it's colour. Pretty and depressing in the same time, LOL!

So far, Autumn di Auckland masi enak banget loh cuacanya..baru awal kali ye? Sekarang gw pake dress selapis and flat ala ala pakaian waktu di Singapore masi sanggup, tapi kl matahari ilang, buru buru deh.."jaket mana jaket?" Gw dari dateng, mo OOTD an yang cantik ala ala fashion blogger gitu, ga kesampean dong! hahahaha..komitmen nya kurang sih ini namanya. LOL! Jangan tanya soal youtube, uda gw record diri gw sendiri..pas gw nonton balik, gw eneg ndiri..dan gw delete, begituuuu terus jek! Tolong akuuuu lah! Hahahaha.. gimana dong?

Anyhoo, about life di Auckland..I found few interesting nice stuff to share :)

This is company co-own by NZ Masterchef winner, Nadia Lim..jadi konsepnya tuh, kita bisa jd masterchef at home :)

Gw order family pack yang datengnya begini, jadi mulai dari resep sampe ingredientsnya semua dari mereka. $162an per week. Cukup buat dinner 2 adult + Ethan, dan dibawa sisanya buat lunch besok siangnya. So far, kita nyoba sekali dan omg sayurnya banyak aje! LOL!

Menu minggu itu kayak gini..and I would say, ingredient nya super fresh bo! Dan sehat bener! Cuman sayangnya, kl tengah minggu pengen makan sop buntut..#eaaaa..harus nunggu sampe minggu itu kelar dulu deh. Tapi enaknya, lu ga usah pusing besok mo masak apa.

2. Auckland Sunset

Breathtakingly beautiful! Ini gw photo dari backyard gw, and gw bisa cuman duduk sambil nungguin matahari ilang :) Cakep banget ya?

3. Homemade Breakfast with "Cafe" quality food.

Gw dari dulu mikir masak itu susah aje, and rempong bener buat dikerjain. Rempongnya masi sama ding, cuman uda ga sesusah yg dulu gw pikir. Dan disini, bahan bahan buat bikin makanan gini tuh murah banget. Kayak Egg Benedict, di cafe sepiring tambah bacon ato salmon bisa $22 alone. Masak di rumah $22 bisa dapet Bacon 500gr + Roti + telor se tray kali..yang ujung ujungnya bisa buat breakfast seminggu :)

4.Shopping Paradise, nope!

Bukan tempat shopping ni negara :)

Walo ada sih tempat tempat lumayan kl mo cari barang ato baju yang local designer, cuman harganya ga wajar bo! Kebiasaan beli Charles and Keith kan ya, $50 dapet lah buat cakep cakepan beberapa kl pake..disini $200! -_-'

Yang ada malah online shopping cantik, seperti hasil belanjaan dari Amazon USA dibawah ini :)
Ini 2 sepatu pilihan Bang Arip bo, gw cuman bilang " I want silver espadrilles " dan ditanya ukuran apa..lalu tibalah sepatu ini :)

Dan yang Gold pun dateng bersamaan as a Christmas gift.
Hore, istri senang!

5. Gardening

Edisi besok besok gw bakal posting soal kebon sayur gw yang kecil :)
Sekarang mo pamer bunga hasil metik dari kebon...gila yah bisa cakep gini warna kombinasinya. Love it to the max!

Trus, gw sekarang nyimpenin sayur sayuran sisa dapur buat ditumbuhin gini. Ini Bak Choi, jd potongnya disisain segini, trus tarok di aer..nanti uda mulai tumbuh tunas tunasnya trus dipindain ke tanah. Lumayan loh, buat persediaan sayur pas winter, secara sayur mahal aje kalo winter. 

6. Sample sale

Mungkin ini lebih ke gw yg kerja di the biggest retail company disini, jadinya sering bener sample sale! Tempat lilin ini, gw jadiin tmpt tarok brush daily gw..tebak berapa harganya? Dan gw ga pernah sample sale di Singapore, pas sampe girang bener! Shopping di toko mahal, jadinya shopping di kantor :P

Kalo ada yg pengen tau tentang something di NZ, drop me a comment or email as always :)
Tapi ga usah tanya gimana proses pindah kemari yah, itu google aja "Migrating to New Zealand"..semua ada di situ.
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March 08, 2016

New Zealand Travel Destination: HOBBITON!

A home to hobbit, and a place to unlock the imagination of the middle earth.

Be ready for this amazing scenic 2 hours journey of the land of hobbit. I am serious when I say this, because I was constantly "Wow-ing" over the gorgeous details of this world known movie set. I am so blessed to get an opportunity living in New Zealand, and be able to see the beautiful scenery this country has to offer, and Hobbiton is really one of the place I'm so glad to spent my money on.

If you are travelling to Auckland and have 1 day to spare, I would suggest you find the local tour that can pick you up to go to this place. Easy google " Hobitton tour auckland " could give you list of day tour that cater to your schedule. As for me, we drove all the way from Auckland to Hobbiton! It was a bloody long trip especially with lil one being cranky most of the time. But, I guess it's worth it.

Take a look at the scenery that greeted me on that day!

And the sleepy lil one, sleeping on me like little Koala :)

Isn't this place amazing? We went to this place on December (which is summer in this part of the world.) and although the sun wasn't that bad during our trip, I would still suggest you guys to apply sunscreen, and bring your sunnies and cap. It could be pretty burning.

You can get your ticket HERE or buy directly at the ticketing area, which is a good idea as well just in case you running late. Overall, minus the cranky baby - I will give this place a 4.5/5 rating, where the 0.5 number goes to the nature of the place that are not accessible by disable. That would be great if one day, I don't know how they do it, but it will be accessible for the wheel chair-er. :)

Enjoy the sneak peak, and till the next travel destination in New Zealand!

I'm so amazed on the details!

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March 07, 2016

Mo sehat? Mo kurus? Cobain Gorry Gourmet!

Ou Hello semuanya! Sedang apa? Daku sedang akan mempromosikan healthy food! Hahahaha..ya eyalah ya jelas - diliat dr judulnya aja uda begitu kan yaaa? Iyah, waktu kemaren eke dapet kesempatan dong nyobain Gorry Gourmet selama seminggu, gara garanya mesti photo keluarga..dan minggu sebelonnya gw ke padang dong bok! Mo mati makanan disana, ngeliat aja bisa nambah berat badannya dong. LOL! Lebay abis. 

Saban 2 jam gw MAKAN! astaganaga..dan mo photo keluarga, gw pengen cakepan dikit dong. Jadilah saya nahan napsu makan, dan siap siap bernestapa ria dengan makanan diet ini. 

Yang pernah diet Mayo, tau kan ya makanan diet itu seperti apa..dan gw uda siap siap aja dong menerima makanan hambar tapi ngecilin pinggang biar langsing. >.< 

Dan..pas gw buka kotak shock dong, ini makanan diet nih? Kok enak bener keliatannya? Fresh, dan super high quality food in a box! Gw langsung senyum selebar lebarnya..hahahahha..ternyata mo kurusan dan jaga makan itu ga perlu pake lidah hambar. LOL!

Ini sebenernya gw niat diet pa kaga yaa? hahahha..tapi liat deh menu nya, ga kayak makanan diet kan?

Penne Salmon :)

Stir fry veggies!

Purple yam.

Dan liat deh menu makanan ku selanjutnya ini, manaaaaaaa yg kayak makanan diet? Ga ada! Semua nya yummy, dengan kalori terkontrol. Hore!

Apapun yang jadi goal kamu, Gorry Gourmet bisa jd solusinya! Misalnya kamu perlu untuk atur berat badan kamu, ngebikin otot, ato cuman pengen ganti lifestyle makan biar sehat? Semua option ada loh, yuk melipir ke wbsite GORRY GOURMET buat info lengkapnya.

I am one happy and satisfied customer! I feel like it was a good start for clean eating and a lifestyle changing. Definitely recommended for friends in Jakarta.

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